We are the defenders of Thedas. We are the Inquisition.

*In the war room*
Iron Bull: You know, I do have a bit of experience myself in strategy planning.
Inquisitor: What’s the best strategy to get you out of your pants?
Cullen: NO. NOT IN HERE. NOT ON MY PAPERWORK. YOU TWO HAVE A BED

Inquisitor: Hrm..this door is locked up pretty tight
Dorian: I’m not sure if my spells would work against it…
Sera: I’m pretty sure arrows from me wouldn’t even dent the damn thing
Inquisitor: What we need is a battering ram, that would work perfectly
Everyone: *looks at Iron Bull* Ohhh Iron Bull~
Iron Bull: NO
Inquisitor: But-
Iron Bull: I said no!
Inquisitor: Well I guess the world is just gonna be overrun by demons and every living soul will have the worst death possible
Iron Bull:…
Inquisitor: *impersonates a kid’s voice* Mommy what’s gonna happen to us?
Sera: *joins in* Well my child since the Inquisition couldn’t get through a door because a man named Iron Bull didn’t want to be a battering ram who knows whats gonna happen to us?
Inquisitor: Eeek a demon, if only that Iron Bull had tore down that door! *pretends to faint*
Sera: Nooo my poor sweet child!
Iron Bull: FINE FINE I’LL DO IT…but only for the children
Inquisitor: Yeah yeah whatever you say

kurgy:

people always talking about what a romanced Iron Bull would do if the Inquisitor were injured or even killed, but damn, I wanna know what the Inquisitor would do if they lost Bull. The Inquisitor, who sees Bull as this massive unstoppable force strong enough to take on any foe, suddenly left alone with nothing but their lovers blood on their hands

https://alistair-at-me.tumblr.com/post/96814259079/audio_player_iframe/alistair-at-me/tumblr_na9x3vn8101rn25l6?audio_file=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.tumblr.com%2Faudio_file%2Falistair-at-me%2F96814259079%2Ftumblr_na9x3vn8101rn25l6

lightgetsout:

During his downtime between fighting demons and weird ass poisons, Iron Bull takes time to asses each of his allies’ potential as living projectiles.

This is the first (of hopefully many) collaboration between spicyshimmy and myself! I am so excited to do these fun projects with such a talented and incredible person! Her writing does most of the work for me! Go give her a follow if you haven’t already!